To Morsel Institute Visitors: Effective February 7 2005, The Morsel Institute will meld with our all-purpose patriarchy-blaming blog, I Blame The Patriarchy.

Stuff Twisty Gets Outside Of
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Fettucine with Lobster December 2004

Douse it with a pint of heavy cream, and even lobster tastes good. This dish was an excuse to sluice down a couple glasses of a really good Montrachet that I just didn't want to waste on some random meatloaf slab.

I bawled like a baby when I boiled the lobster alive, however. I'd made the mistake of looking it in the eye, and it tried to grab the sides of the pot on the way in. The tragedy made the sauce extremely delicious.

Chuck Roast Braised in Wine with Onions and Potatoes, Buttered Egg Noodles, Brussel's Sprouts in Brown Butter, December 2004

"Potatoes," you say, "and noodles? What're ya, nuts?" Well, what if I am? You're sitting there reading this, so what does that make you?

Pot roast is one of those things nobody makes anymore, so it's almost like discovering some unbelievable new taste sensation. I rate it right up there with bacon, macadamia nuts, and fried chicken skin.

Chicken with Tarragon Cream, Leftover Butternut Squash Risotto, Steamed Broc, December 2004

I am on a bender where I can't stop making these gonzo sauces with tarragon and heavy cream. They make any day a little brighter, any thigh a little fatter!

Leftover Pot Roast, January 1 2005

I got outside a slab of this roast while listening to Radio Dismuke, a guy who plays nothing that wasn't recorded before anybody was born. His 1914 recordng of "It's A Long Way To Tipperary" has a skip in the first chorus, afflicting the listener with acute tipperarius interruptus.

I can't seem to stomach anything newer.

The leftover pot roast looks leathery and wan in the picture, but it yielded nicely to the Posey-Smith teeth.

More Leftover Pot Roast, Onion Gravy, Tomato and Onion Gratin, a Few Loose Brussel's Sprouts I Found Rolling Around in the Veg. Drawer, January 2 2005

This dinner had a fairly messy prep, which ordinarily fazes me not a whit, but this week my dishwasher is on the fritz. This is not surprising, because the dishwasher is Australian. This means it flushes the opposite way and is descended from convicts. It also means that it will beep continuously like a crack dealer's pager when it's broken, and that nobody will come to fix it for at least a week.

You should ask me for the tomato gratin recipe, because it is quite the festive little side dish.


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